The entire Philippines was shook and shattered by the news of Jason and Moira Hernandez’s breakup. The couple was known for their godly marriage and stories of defeat and victory and while so many of us have been inspired by their lives and testimonies, the separation of the couple is one big thing we all never expected to happen.
Being married, I can’t help but take a look at my own and talk about my fears and feelings with my husband. We say we are currently awesome (by God’s grace) but we cannot be fully certain of what life may throw at us in the future. At this point, I would like to share and express some things we both believe in and live for which work on us and may work on you, too.
Just last May on my birthday, I told my husband I wanted flowers, Sunflowers to be very specific. Without delay, I and my husband went to the mall, I chose my bouquet, and my husband paid for it.
“Happy?” he asked.
“Yeth!” I grinned.
“Do you want anything else?” he added.
“Nope!” I replied.
I was genuinely happy and we were both peaceful.
See, my husband and I came from a totally different background. While I was raised celebrating my birthday in a huge scale, my husband celebrated his at home with his family. While my view of a grand gesture means material things, my husband’s notion for a grand surprise may be a nice cake. When he gave me a luxury staycation the weekend before my birthday, he wouldn’t think flowers could be as special as the 5-Star All-inclusive stay.
Number 1 reflection is – Tell. We don’t expect, we communicate clearly what we want to avoid unnecessary dramas and conflict in our relationship. Yes, surprises are nice but we don’t expect it all the times especially when we have other individual issues to face on.
Conflict arises when needs are not met. Needs may not be met because of unclear communication. I used to expect and spark a fight with my husband and he taught me straight by clearly saying, “We are not kids anymore. We are not high school or college lovers. We are married adults. Don’t expect me to guess and read your mind.”
It is actually simple (AND IT WORKS!)
Life is simple. And it is even more beautiful when we make things less complicated.
<Part 2 is coming up>